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CHILD PROTECTION
As a society, our efforts to prevent crimes against children have not kept pace with
the increasing vulnerability of our youngest citizens. After hearing the tragic stories
about abducted or exploited children, most Americans are surprised to learn that many
crimes against children CAN BE PREVENTED. The messages in this guide, however, can be
different from other safety and prevention instructions you have read.
The most important key to child safety is effective communication with your child.
Remember, children who are not listened to or who do not have their needs met in the home
are more vulnerable to abduction or exploitation. The first step you should take is to
establish an atmosphere in the home in which your child feels truly comfortable in
discussing sensitive matters and in relating experiences in which someone may have
approached the child in an appropriate manner or in a way that made the child
uncomfortable. The simple truth is that children are often too afraid or too confused to
report their experiences and their fears. In some ways, you should treat you children as
you would your adult friends - allow them to talk freely about their likes and dislikes,
their friends, their true feelings.
Unfortunately, the rising awareness of crimes against children has left many
families with a real sense of fear. You and your child need to be careful, but you do NOT
need to be afraid. Talk to your child in a calm and reasonable manner, being careful not
to discuss the frightening details of what might happen to a child who does not follow the
safety guidelines.
THE EXPLOITER OR ABDUCTOR: NOT A
"STRANGER"
"Stay away from strangers" is a popular warning to children to prevent
abduction or exploitation. Unfortunately, however, many children are abducted or exploited
by people who have some type of familiarity with the children but who may not be known to
the parents.
The term STRANGER suggests a concept that children do not understand and is one that
ignores what we do know about the people who commit crimes against children. It misleads
children into believing that they should be aware only of individuals who have an unusual
or slovenly appearance. Instead, it is more appropriate to teach our children to be on the
lookout for certain kinds of SITUATIONS or ACTIONS rather than certain kinds of
individuals.
Children can be raised to be polite and friendly, but it is okay for them to be
suspicious of any adult asking for assistance. Children help other children, but there is
no need for them to be assisting adults. Children should not be asked to keep special
secrets form their parents and, of course, children should not be asked to touch anyone in
the bathing suit areas of their body or allow anyone to touch them in those areas.
Often exploiters or abductors initiate a seemingly innocent contact with the victim.
They may try to get to know the children and befriend them. They use subtle approaches
that both parents should be aware of. Children should learn to stay away from individuals
in cars or vans; and they should know that it is okay to say NO -- even to an adult.
Remember, a clear, calm, and reasonable message about SITUATIONS and ACTIONS to look
out for is easier for a child to understand than a particular profile or image of a
"stranger."
WHAT YOU CAN DO TO PREVENT CHILD ABDUCTION AND EXPLOITATION
- Know where your children are at all time. Be familiar with their friends and daily
activities
- Be sensitive to changes in your children's behavior; they are a signal that you
should sit down and talk to your children about what caused the changes.
- Be alert to a teenager or adult who is paying an unusual amount of attention you your
children or giving them inappropriate or expensive gifts.
- Teach your children to trust their own feelings, and assure them that they have the
right to say NO to what they sense is wrong.
- Listen carefully to your children's fears, and be supportive in all your discussions
with them.
- Teach your children that no one should approach them or touch them in a way that
makes them feel uncomfortable. If someone does, they should tell the parents immediately.
- Be careful about babysitters and any other individuals who have custody of your
children.
BASIC RULES OF SAFETY FOR CHILDREN
As soon as your children can articulate a sentence, they can begin the process of
learning how to protect themselves against abduction and exploitation. Children should be
taught:
- If you are in a public place, and you get separated from your parents, don't wander
around looking for them. Go to a checkout counter, the security office, or the lost and
found and quickly tell the person in charge that you have lost your mom and dad and need
help in finding them.
- You should not get into a car or go anywhere with any person unless you parents have
told you that it is okay.
- If someone follows you on foot or in a car, stay away form him or her. You don't need
to go near the car to talk to the people inside.
- Grownups and other older people who need help should not be asking children for help;
they should be asking older people.
- No one should be asking you for directions or to look for a "lost puppy" or
telling you that your mother or father is in trouble and that he will take you to them.
- If some tries to take you somewhere, quickly get away from him (or her) and yell or
scream. "This man is trying to take me away" or "This person is not
my father (or mother)."
- You should try to use the "buddy system: and never go places alone.
- Always ask your parents' permission to leave the yard or play area or to go into
someone's home.
- Never hitchhike or try to get a ride home with anyone unless your parents have told
you it is okay to ride with him or her.
- No one should ask you to keep a special secret. If he or she does, tell your parents
or teacher.
- If someone wants to take your picture, tell him or her NO and tell your parents or
teacher.
- No one should touch you in parts of the body covered by the bathing suit, nor should
you touch anyone else in those areas. Your body is special and private.
- You can be assertive, and you have the right to say NO to someone who tries to take
you somewhere, touches you, or makes you feel uncomfortable in any way.
CHILD PROTECTION IS THE RESPONSIBILITY OF EVERYONE
Because children cannot look out for themselves, it is our responsibility to look
out for them. Every home and school should establish a program that effectively teaches
children about safety and protection measures. As a parent, you should take an active
interest in your children, and listen to them. Teach you children that they can be
assertive in order to protect themselves against abduction and exploitation. And, most
important, make your home a place of trust and support that fulfils your child's needs --
so that he or she won't seek love and support from someone else.
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